Mahabis

If you don’t know Mahabis Slippers then here is a bit of advice for you.

Do not try and find out.

Because I did, and I’m paying the price.

A friend of mine has a pair and I thought they were pretty groovy so I googled them.

Once. I googled them just once.

And now I cannot get rid of the fucking slippers.

They’re all over my timeline. They’re on my Facebook, my Twitter, they’ve made their way to my email and they’re on every single website I look at.

They’re the most aggressive digital slippers in the world and they’re also bloody ugly.

They’ve even taken over my sexting exchanges.

Violet, honey, remove your Mahabis.

Hey Violet, are you wearing your Mahabis.

Violet, drop those Mahabis immediately.

Oh oh oh, Mahabis, yes, yes, oh oh…

How does the internet know? I mean, I get that there are algorithms and all that but this is just me, one little person online being bombarded by one product that I am not going to buy. And that I googled, just once.

LEAVE ME ALONE MAHABIS.

Even though I did like you and you’re not really ugly and the grey ones with the pink soles are gorgeous and the idea of being able to change soles is so nice and those red ones are cool and they are a groovy slipper and how cool to just slip them on after sex, but still.

$130 for a pair of slippers. It’s a bit insane.

Go.

Take your Mahabis.

Get them off my timeline.

And just leave me to sext barefoot dammit.

18 thoughts on “Mahabis

  1. haha You write about it all so amusingly, but it Is annoying when you google something Once and then forever after get bombarded.
    Hopefully they will tire with it after a while – and you can move onto the Next Ad. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Violet,

    I get this crap happening too. It would be pretty cool if someone engineered a reverse algorithm where once Manabis had put their slippers in front of you five times, then there would be a mail out to everyone at the company, all their friends (and your friends through a secure channel) with a picture of you. The caption would read “This is Violet, she thinks Mahabis are crap and would never purchase something so putrid. I’d pay to keep such a service at my fingertips.

    RR

    Liked by 1 person

  3. They SOUND like they should be sexy but then they look like small felted caves for your feet. I am confused.

    Also a little concerned that mentioning them so many times in one post is going to bring the curse of the Mahabis on you. Because that sounds like it would be a thing.

    Liked by 1 person

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