I read your story last night, Violet. You disappoint me.
Excuse me? How dare he. I was shocked.
I don’t think I disappoint anyone.
I pouted a little. Also, what was he talking about. If he doesn’t like my stories he should write his own.
He continued while I sipped my wine, staring at me with his cold (but irresistible) German eyes.
Your title was wrong. Your story was boring. No-one cares about your ex-husband. Also, I was expecting something a lot more exciting about threesomes.
I don’t take criticism well. Apparently.
Fuck you, I replied.
That is what I want to do, Violet. You know that. But you know I want to fuck you with another woman at the same time.
I spat out my cupcake. This conversation was taking a different turn.
I don’t know why, but I started explaining myself.
Threesomes are not my thing. I’ve told you that. I have, well, I’m kinda conservative and I wouldn’t know what to do and also well again, fuck you, If you want a threesome you should find another woman, or two, to do it with. And don’t tell me. I don’t want to know. And also, if you do it, well, fuck you, and I don’t want to ever see you or your pink couch again.
I hate it when he smiles.
If I wanted another woman, Violet, I would find one. Easily. In this instance, I want you to find the other woman. One that you are attracted to, one that you want to be with. So that I can be with you. Both. And watch. It’s my fantasy. Indulge me.
I choked on my cupcake.
No, I said. Just no.
But he smiled again.
And as I was licking the sublime nutella fudge frosting off my lips, I realised I was not that convincing. And maybe licking one thing while licking another could be quite nice.
Maybe, I said. I’ll think about it. In my own time.
In. My. Own. Time.
And don’t you dare call me boring.